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Dr. Vavra's ENL 121: Lit & Comp 
 Fall 1998: MP # 1 
A Set of Essays 
on Short Stories
 
Paper # 633
 Dr. Vavra's Course Menu Main ENL 121 Menu  Current MP #1 Assignment
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To Age or not to Age

(1)      In “Dr. Heidegger’s Experiment," Nathaniel Hawthorne expresses [Diction] that if given the chance to regain your youth, some would not have learned from their past mistakes, to change the way would live their life again.  In “Dr Heidegger’s Experiment” Hawthorne uses his characters to describe how life experiences should have an impression in our lives.

(2)      Dr Heidegger was an old scientist, who has a very strange way of presenting himself.  He works by himself in his study.  Which many find to be a “very curious place.”(Pg. 578) [Frag -1] In his study there is a picture of a women [Hostage 50] who once was his lover.  She was going to be the one that he was going to marry, but she had been affected with a disorder and had taken some of the pills he prescribed and died. “She had swallowed one of her lovers prescription’s and died on the bridal evening.”(Pg. 579)  It is thought that Dr. Heidegger might have had something to do with her death, but it was unknown.  “The greatest curiosity of the study remains to be mentioned.”(Pg. 579) [Why was this uotation included?] The doctor had an experiment that would turn back the hands of time, but he would not have any part of it, he just wanted to observe.  [How is this paragraph related to the thesis?]

(3)      Dr. Heidegger called on four of his friends to help him with his experiment. [This topic sentence suggests a plot summary.]  Mr. Medbourne who was a prosperous merchant in his early day (Pg. 579), Colonel Killigrew wasted his years on sinful pleasures (Pg. 579), Mr. Guscoigne was a ruined politician (Pg. 579), and Widow Wycherly was a beauty in her younger day, but had been isolated from society (Pg. 579).  All of the friends had lived a life of relationships with all three men, [homosexual?] which almost caused them to kill each other over her, “had once been on the point of cutting each other's throats for her sake.”(Pg. 579) [This quotation is inaccurate.]  This is what caused for her to be an outcast with the town. “scandalous stories which had prejudiced the gentry of the town against her.”(Pg. 579) [Frag - 1] When asked to participate in the experiment, they were all a little skeptical. [Why is this relevant to the thesis?] Mr. Medbourne and Mr. Gascoigne went along with it, but Colonel and Widow Wycherly found it to be nonsense.  After agreeing, they were asked to make rules for guidance, so when they were young again they do not make the same mistakes.  “The doctor's friends made him no answer, except for the tremulous laugh, the idea was very ridiculous.”(Pg. 581)  They then proceeded with the experiment, after they are young again, they do everything that they said they never would do. [CS-1] [The writer could have focussed on the character of each of the four friends, but has not done so; instead, the preceding is basically a plot summary.]

(4)      There is a lot of conflict between them, from when they are old to when they are young.  Before venturing into the experiment they are melancholy beings that are unsure about the experiment.  After being in the experiment they are cheerful, and are asking for more water.  They make fun of the old people; they even joke about the clothing that they are wearing.  As the experiment continued they did everything that they said they would not.  Mr Medbourne was thinking of how he was going to become rich, "Involved in calculation of dollars and cents, with which was strangely intermingled a project for supplying the East Indies with ice, by harnessing a team of whale to the polar icebergs.”(Pg. 583)  Colonel Killigrew was busy singing beer songs and checking out Widow Wycherly’s figure, “all this time he had been trolling forth a jolly bottle song, and ringing his glass in symphony with the chorus, while his eyes wandered towards the buxom figure of the Widow Wycherly.”(Pg. 583)  Mr. Gascoigne was busy with the political topics running in his head.  “He rattled forth full-throated sentences about patriotism, national glory, and the peoples rights; now he muttered some perilous stuff or other, in a sly and doubtful whisper”, “as if a royal ear were listening to his well turned periods.”(Pg. 583)  At last there is Widow Wycherly, who was busy dancing in front of a mirror gazing at herself.  “She stood before the mirror curtsying and simpering to her own image, and greeting it as the friend whom she loved better than all the world beside.” (Pg. 583)  They later found themselves in the same situation, when they were alive. They all wanted to dance with her be cause [because] of her restored beauty, “there a livelier picture of youthful rivalship, with bewitching beauty for the prize.’ (Pg. 586) [Inaccurate page reference.] “The three rivals began interchanging threatening glances, still keeping hold of the fair prize.” (Pg. 586)  Which causes them to begin a fight over her again.  [Frag - 1] This causes the water to be dumped all over the floor.  Having the water on the floor and out of the vase causes the experiment to be reversed.

(5)      As the story started to unfold, also came along with it were different tones. [Poor topic sentence -- How does the tone relate to your view of the theme?] The story has a scary tone to it.  Dr Heideggers study for instance, the cobwebs decorating the old fashion chambers.  The dust that seems to have been there for a while. [Frag -1]  “The study must have been a very curious place, It was dim, old fashion chamber, festoon with cobwebs and sprinkled with antique dust.”(Pg. 579)  The mirror that hangs over the bookcase, “it was fabled that spirits of all the doctors deceased patience’s dwell within its verge, and would stare him in the face whenever he looked in.”(Pg. 580) [Poor sentence structure] The picture of his young lady was said to walk out of the picture if you touched any of his books, which were said to magic book. [?] “ the picture of the young lady had stepped one foot upon the floor, and several ghastly faces had peered forth from the mirror, while the brazen head of Hippocrates frowned, and the skeleton rattled in the closet.”(Pg. 580)

(6)      The question of why once again faced the readers. [?] Dr. Heidegger did not drink any of the water; he said that he only wanted to observe.  Why did he not want to return to his youth?  “I am old and rheumatic, and my dancing days are over.”(Pg. 854) [Inaccurate page reference.]  If he had seen that the water worked, why didn’t he drink some of it to.[Hostage 50]  After the story ends, the tone changes again to be happy for him.  The readers learn that Dr. Heidegger has appreciated growing old and has also learned that the advantages of aging are gaining knowledge through life experiences. [Which of his experiences did he learn from?] While the others plan a pilgrimage to Florida to drink from the Fountain of Youth, he says, “he would not stoop to bathe my lips in it.”(Pg. 583)

(7)      Hawthorne’s “Dr. Heidegger’s Experiment” is a story that makes you think.  If given the chance, would you return to your youth and relive it all over again.?  What Hawthorne tries to tell us (readers) is as long as you have learned some life long lessons through your life, who needs to go through it again.     

 


Outline
 
Instead of handing in one outline, this student handed in three
-- one for each section of the essay.
This is not acceptable.
Characterization 
(1) 
I. Intro & Thesis: The theme of Nathaniel Hawthorne’s “Dr Heidegger’s Experiment” is learning from your mistakes, not repeating them. 
(2) 
II. Dr. Heidegger 
    A. Singular(strange) man 
      1. the experiment 
      2. his study 
      3. his not participating in the experiment 
    B. Physical characteristics 
      1. old doctor 
      2. gray hair 
      3. one love 
(3) 
III.     His four guest 
    A. Mr. Medbourne 
      1. prosperous merchant in his day (579) 
      2. had a relationship with Widow Wycherly 
      3. felt that there was no need to make a “rule of guidelines” 
      4. went along with experiment 
      5. when young again, was thinking of ways to regain his money 
      6. fought with Mr. Gascoigne and Colonel Killigrew over Widow Wycherly again. 
      7. did not learn anything from experiment 
    B.  Colonel Killigrew 
      1. wasted his years on sinful pleasures (579) 
      2. also had a relationship with Widow Wycherly 
      3. did not believe doctors story about the water 
      4. also felt that there was no need to make a “rule of guidelines” 
      5. when young again, all he did was sing jolly bottle song, and look at the figure of Widow Wycherly 
      6. fought with Mr. Gascoigne and Mr Medbourne over Widow Wycherly 
      7. did not learn anything from the experiment 
     C.  Mr. Gasoigne 
      1. a ruined politician, a man of evil fame (579) 
      2. also had a relationship with Widow Wycherly 
      3. went along with experiment 
      4. felt no reason for a “rule of guideline” 
      5. when young, all thought about political topics 
      6. fought with Mr. Medbourne and Colonel Killigrew over Widow Wycherly 
      7. did not learn anything from the experiment 
    C.[?] Widow Wycherly 
      1. was a beauty in her day 
      2. lived in deep seclusion 
      a. scandalous stories 
      b. had a relationship with all three men, and the town was prejudice against her 
      3. found experiment to be nonsense 
      4. thought there was no reason to make a “rule of guidelines” 
      5. when young again, all she did was admire herself in the mirror 
      6. had the men fighting over her again. 
      7. she did not learn anything from the experiment either 
 
Conflict
(1) 
I. Intro & Thesis: The theme of Nathaniel Hawthorne’s “Dr. Heidegger’s Experiment” if given the chance to regain youth, some would not have learned from their past mistakes to change them. 
(4) 
II. Past vs. Present 
    A. The differences between their actions 
      1. Before experiment 
        a. melancholy (sad) people 
        b. uncertain about the experiment 
      2. During the experiment 
        a. cheerful 
        b. kept asking for more of the water 
        c. joked about the clothing that they had on 
          1. the wideskirted coats 
          2. the flapped waistcoats 
          3. the ancient cap 
        d. made fun of  old people, including Dr. Hiedegger 
    B. Their actions in the end did not change 
      1. Mr. Medbourne 
        a. a prosperous merchant, who lost everything, because of risky 
        business deals 
        b. planning away to get icebergs to the East Indies 
      2. Colonel Killigrew 
        a. wasted the best years of his life on sinful pleasures 
        b. sang jolly bottle songs and looked at the figure of Widow Wycherly 
      3. Mr. Gascoigne 
        a. a ruined politician 
        b. had his mind on political topics 
      4. Widow Wycherly 
        a. lived in seclusion because of a scandalous story 
        b. had men fighting over her 
Tone
(1) 
I. Intro & Thesis: The theme of Nathaniel Hawthorne’s “Dr. Heidegger Experiment” is with age comes knowledge from life’s experiences. 
(5) 
II. Scary 
    A.  Dr. Heidegger’s study 
              1.  old fashion chamber 
      2.  decorated with cobwebs 
              3.   never has been dusted (antique dust)(579) 
              4.   mirror 
              5.   picture of his love 
    B. bookcase 
      1. rows of folios 
      2. black letter quarto 
      3. parchment covered duodecimos 
      4. the bronze bust of Hippocrates 
III. Mysterious 
     A.  Dr Hiedegger not drinking the water
      1. said that he wanted to observe 
      2. would never drink from the “Fountain of Youth” 
IV. Happy 
    A.  Learned to appreciate growing old by watching his three friends act like idiots 
    B. learned a lesson from the experiment 
      1. advantage of aging and gaining knowledge through life experiences 
 
This outline contains too many details, most of which are not clearly related to the thesis.

 
ENL 121 (Vavra) Grading Sheet for MP1 (1 of 2)
Possible 
Points
Student's 
Grading
Instructor's 
Grading
Description Totals
Audience (20)  14
0 - 3   2 The essay has a good introductory paragraph.
0 - 3   2 The essay has a good concluding paragraph.
0 - 4
  0 The essay goes beyond the obvious.
0-10   10 The essay does not simply retell the story.
Thesis (20)  9
0 - 5    4 The thesis is clearly identifiable, somewhere near the beginning of the essay.
0 - 5    1 The thesis enables an interpretation, not a retelling, of the story.
0 - 5    4 The thesis reflects at least an average understanding of the concepts studied.
0 - 5    0 The thesis reflects an above average understanding of the concepts studied and the story.
 Organization (20)  13
0 - 5    5 The essay has at least four paragraphs.
0 - 5    3 Topic sentences relate paragraphs to the thesis.
0 - 5
   5 Topic sentences cover paragraphs.
0 - 5    0 Outline and paragraphs reflect subdivisions of major points.
Details (20)  13
5    5 The essay includes some details.
0 - 5    4 One concept (__characterization___)  is explained in good detail.
0 - 5    0 A second concept (_conflict__) is explained in good detail. [Not one of the conflicts discussed in class or in the study material on conflicts is mentioned in the essay.] 
0 - 5    4 A third concept (__tone_) is explained in good detail.
 
(2 of 2)
Possible 
Points
Student's 
Grading
Instructor's 
Grading
Description Totals
Style (20)  16
0 - 3    3 Words are used correctly and accurately.
0 - 2    2 There are no (few) errors in usage.
0 - 2    2 Pronouns are used correctly.
0 - 2    2 Verb forms and tenses are used correctly.
0 - 3    3 All sentences are comprehensible.
0 - 2    0 Sentence structure is mature and varied.
0 - 4
   4 Underlining, italics, and quotation marks are used correctly.
0 - 2
   0 There are few or no sloppy errors. [Inaccurate quotations and page references]
Minus Style Penalty Points (May be regained by correcting errors) -6
Basic Grade for the Essay (100)  59
Penalty Points: - __________ Late          -10 Didn't use a Major Paper log_ Other -10
Bonus Points (9 possible) +
0 - 3     Brainstorming
0 - 3     Outlining
0 - 3     Revision
Final Grade for the Essay  49
Hostage Fifty: 
    Apostrophe
    to / too
    woman / women
If anything is written in the "Hostage Fifty" block, read the Additional Requirements for Major Papers.

Student's Comments: (You can also use the back of either page.)

 
Student's Log
 
     The student used a weekly, not an MP log. As a result, process codes were not included. As a result of that, I have no idea how the student's time was spent. As a result of that, the only suggestions I have are that the student should have started much earlier and gotten help, either from the Tutoring Center, or from me. The primary problem with this essay is that the thesis states the obvious. As a result, the student brings in a lot of details, but they have nothing to support. Some students show me a thesis and outline a week or more before an essay is due. I can then help them if their thesis, like this one, will cause a major problem. But if I don't see it, I can't help.

Codes: B = Brainstorming; RR = Reading/Research; O =Outlining; TC = Tutoring Center;
D = Drafting; RV = Revising; E =Editing; G = Grading; T =Typing

NOTE: Revising = RV. Remember: use only one code per entry. (See Instructions.)

I used a word-processor _____while drafting _____ while revising _____ to type my paper.
 

Date: Code Started Stopped Minutes Comments
 9/29/98
MP1
 6:30
 10:30
 240
 9/30/98
MP1 
4:00 
 12:00
 460
 
Distribution of Time: [NA]
Process Minutes % of Total
Brainstorming
 
 
Read/Research
 
 
Outlining
 
 
Tutoring Center
 
 
Drafting
 
 
Revising
 
 
Editing
 
 
Grading
 
 
Typing
 
 
Total
 700
=  11.7 hours