This document is part of a study, conducted by Ed Vavra, of the syntax of students' writing.

Spring 1995 Pre Writing Student # 61

Student's Text:

Comments:

\-\[After women were given the right to vote,] they have accomplished more {in the so called "Mens World."} \-\They demand more rights, more freedom, \-\and {above all} they demand to be treated as equal {with men.}

\-\You will notice this more {in the work place,} [so [when a woman is reprimanded [because her skirt is three inches {above the knee,}]] she could really get ofended.] \-\[When you work {for the City Planning Commission,}] the job could include going {to the work-site} [where men are working {without shirts} {because of the heat,}] \,\should women demand [that they cover themselfs] [because they are showing more {than three inches} {of chest.}]

\-\I really feel [that the Supervisor {in this case} was over-reacting,] [because the skirts were not so revealing,] and [he should have been doing his job {instead of checking the length} {of their skirts.}]

\-\The two women have a good case {against their supervisor.} \-\He will learn {at least} a good lesson {out of this incident,} [because their is no turning back {to women being second class citizens,} Namely {in this country.}]

Level 3 Subordinate clause

[sic]

[? sic]

[sic]

Raw Data

Calculated Data

Number of words = 180
Number of paragraphs = 4

Number of main clauses = 9

# of Prepositional Phrases = 19
# of words in P Phrases = 65

# of Sub Clauses Level 1 = 10
# of Words in = 106

# of Sub Clauses Level 2 = 1
# of Words in = 14

# of Sub Clauses Level 3 = 1
# of Words in = 9

# of Sub Clauses Level 4= 0
# of Words in = 0

# of Fragments = 0
# of Comma Splices = 1
# of Run-ons = 0

# of S/V Agr Errors = 0

Words per main clause = 20.0

Prep Phrases / Main Clause = 2.11
% of words in P Phrases = 36

Total Sub Clauses / Main Cl = 1.33

Sub Clauses Level 2+ / MC = .22

Words per paragraph = 45.0

Main clauses per paragraph = 2.3

Unanalyzed Text:

      After women were given the right to vote, they have accomplished more in the so called "Mens World." They demand more rights, more freedom, and above all they demand to be treated as equal with men.
     You will notice this more in the work place, so when a woman is reprimanded because her skirt is three inches above the knee, she could really get ofended. When you work for the City Planning Commission, the job could include going to the work-site where men are working without shirts because of the heat, should women demand that they cover themselfs because they are showing more than three inches of chest.
     I really feel that the Supervisor in this case was over-reacting, because the skirts were not so revealing, and he should have been doing his job instead of checking the length of their skirts.
     The two women have a good case against their supervisor. He will learn at least a good lesson out of this incident, because their is no turning back to women being second class citizens, Namely in this country.