Why God Never Received  Tenure at the University
     He
had
only
one major publication.
/ 
      It was
{in
obscure languages}./ 
      It had
no
references.
/ 
      It wasn't
published
{in
a refereed journal}. / 
      Some
even
doubt
[he
wrote
it
himself. (Appositive
to 
 "he")] / 
      It may
be true [that
Note #1 he
created
the
universe,]
/
 but what
has
he
done{since
then}? /
      His cooperative efforts
have
been quite limited.
/ 
      The scientific community
has
had a hard time
replicating
his 
 results.
/ 
      He
never
applied
{to
the Ethics Board} {for permission} to use
  human
subjects
. / 
      [When one
experiment
went
awry]
he
tried
to cover it
up {by 
 drowning 
the subjects}./ 
      [When subjects
didn't
behave
[as
predicted,]]
he
deleted
them 
 {from the sample}./ 
      He rarely
came
{to class}, just
told
students to read
the Book.
/ 
      Some
say
[he
had
his son teach
the class.] 
/
      He expelled
his
first two students
{for
learning 
too much}.
/ 
      [Although there
were only ten requirements,]
most students
 failed his
tests.
/ 
      His office hours
were
infrequent
and
usually
held
{on a remote 
 mountaintop}. / 
  
 Donna Kleiner, Internet e-mail 3/21/97. 
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